Monday, February 09, 2009

The Road to Oscar/Luis

The Oscars are coming up soon (which means so are our own Luis Awards- no, we didn't forget) so let's look back at some Oscar surrealism.



Now, I'm tempted to not provide any sort of commentary on this at all- except the damn thing is so excruciating you probably wouldn't watch it. Seriously, as someone who was excited about Criterion's 2-disc release of Pasolini's Salo, or the 120 Days of Sodom I will go on the record and say that this is unwatchable, and flat-out morally reprehensible.

So instead of talking anymore, I'm going to do this. I'm going to send you over to Phil Hall's great column at Film Threat, The Bootleg Files and you can read all about it and find tidbits like this:
More embarrassing was an open letter to the Academy that was published right after the telecast. Julie Andrews, Gregory Peck, Paul Newman, Sidney Lumet and Billy Wilder were among the A-listers who signed the letter, which called the telecast "an embarrassment to both the Academy and the entire motion picture industry" and added it was "neither fitting nor acceptable that the best work in motion pictures be acknowledged in such a demeaning fashion."
By the way, if you're not reading Phil's column, you're really missing out on articles about some of the most bizarre (and usually misguided) movies you've never heard of.

Is it just me or does this blog get worse everyday? I seriously sent you to another link if you want any information at all about this post. Bad surrealist. Bad. Bad.

Dan

Friday, February 06, 2009

Joaquin Not Joakin'

I'm not going to bother to say anything... Joaquin, I'll let you handle this:
"There's not a hoax," Phoenix tells the Associated Press of doubts about his sudden conversion from movie star to hip-hop artist. "Might I be ridiculous? Might my career in music be laughable? Yeah, that's possible, but that's certainly not my intention."
People Magazine has more.

Also, I think I totally subconsciously stole this headline from Film Drunk. Sorry everyone.

Dan

Thursday, February 05, 2009

Super Bowl Porn Update: Free Money!

The Super Bowl Porn saga continues. This most recent twist is a move by Comcast to save face (in this context that feels really dirty...) by sending all their customers who may have witnessed the accidental porn $10.

So, as Wonkette puts it, Comcast will pay their customers to watch pornography.

Surrealism is alive and well.

Dan

ART WE LIKE: The "I Can Read Movies" Series

ART WE LIKE is a weekly column where we, Dan and Vince, present art that doesn't suck.
Artist Spacesick has decided to "Make Something Cool Everyday" and post it to Flickr. This is very cool, the creation of art, any art, is something we support.

Even cooler though is the fact that A. he/she's good and B. he/she has recently decided to devote this series to old pulp-novel-looking covers for non-existent film novelizations, such as the ones seen above. And the one seen below...

Anyway, you can check out the whole series of covers, along with whatever other cool stuff Spacesick makes, on Flickr.

Dan

Wednesday, February 04, 2009

Welcome to Texas, home of the Zombie Apocalypse

Well, here we are, three years before the Mayan calendar predicted the end of the world, and apparently the zombies have already arrived in Texas.

But not really. Turns out this was all just a big joke. And although we had nothing to do with it, we will take credit for the idea, since we wrote about this exact thing several months ago in connection with the release of the movie Eagle Eye, although we did suggest the very un-Surreal approach of actually renting space on the digital billboards. Oh well. When you innovate, you can't always see all the angles.

Tuesday, February 03, 2009

Porn During the Super Bowl and Why It Means Surrealism is Alive and Well

Okay- I'm going to blame this on poor research on my part. But at one point in time, Luis Buñuel (I think- correct me if I'm wrong) said (and I'm paraphrasing) that a truly surrealist gesture would be to lock people in a theater and inflict a pornographic movie on them... (If I could somehow Google through the books on my bookshelf I could get an exact quote- but alas, I can't).

Anyway, cut to last night's Superbowl- then Cut to Pornography.

Here's the story:
TUCSON, Ariz. — A cable television provider has apologized to Tucson-area customers over a 30-second porn interruption during the Super Bowl. Philadelphia-based Comcast issued a brief statement Monday saying the company is "mortified" and is conducting a thorough investigation.
Check out NSFW video of the event here. The story continues...
Comcast spokeswoman Jennifer Khoury says the initial investigation suggests that the interruption was an "isolated, malicious act."
So, whichever master control operator pulled this off, technically, did something very surreal. Very surreal. Think about it, how many people can you fit in a movie theater? 200 these days- if you're lucky, though the number in the old days. Now, how many people watch the Super Bowl? I don't know (again, poor research) but way more than 200. So not only did this guy perform a surrealist act, he performed a surrealist act on a scale far greater than the original surrealists ever imagined!

In conclusion, should the culprit chose to come forward they would definitely lose their job, possibly face jail-time, and be welcomed with open arms here at P.S.U.A. - the surrealists union.

Dan

Monday, February 02, 2009

Surreal Blog Post #1

People always go:

Hey Dan and Vince, I love your blog- but it's not really surreal is it?

And then we go:

Well, we're surreal- and we make it, and we talk about surreal things- so I think that counts...

Then we feel kind of awkward, being called out by a 'normal' and all...

But we don't post 'surreal blogs' because, frankly, we didn't think you guys could take it- but, hey, you asked for it...

So here we go. Surreal Blog Post #1. This is going to be totally surreal. You've been warned!



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Dan