Reader E-mail: "Hello!"

We got a MySpace mesage from Lindy, she wants us to date her Mom. Can you blame her?

Hi! They call her "milk", 'cause she does a body good ;-)

I'm talking about my mother. She's single and would want to date a handsome guy like you She's a busy woman, she works and volunteers at an animal shelter once in a while. She plays the piano, reads books and loves to cook. She uses recipes she finds on the net. She is open-minded, laid-back, romantic and patient. She is also energetic and fun to hang around with � she's not negative and enjoys life's simple pleasures. I hope you'll write back! dont reply hear though; this is my account, she doesn't have one. Send your reply to her email address a mariestutsman@gmail.

Have fun!

Well, well... Now as saucy as this is, let me add in this detail- judging by her profile picture, Lindy looks like a model, so if the apple doesn't fall far from the tree... well, you can imagine...

Anyway, we had to respond:

Lindy,

So glad you wrote. Vince and I were just saying how we should take our surrealing to the dating-world... Your mom sound cool, I like that she's not negative, and that she, also, apparently likes to do a lot of stuff (and does do it, she doesn't just like it, she actually does it).

But, dear Lindy, I worry... Does your Mom really have the time to date, not one, but two practicing surrealists? Can she stand the constant 24/7X2 phone calls and professions of love...

"Milk, I would run through a forest of feet for you!"

"Milk, farmers wouldn't have to grow potatoes if they knew what grew in my heart for you."

"Milk, A forest of feet (shoed or unshoed) is no match for the love I have for you."

"Milk, were you at the store last week? Someone was there, they looked like you."

"Milk, the reason I was late for our date (which I forgot to tell you about) was because I tried to take a short cut through the forest of feet again- this proved to be a bad idea, because while the feet (planted in the ground ankle-first) are only about 8 inches high, my vision was obscured by the thought of you..."

Consider all of this; scheduling, surrealing and feet forests and get back to me...

Look forward to hearing from you soon,

Dan

We'll keep you posted!

Dan