We are saddened by the loss of French filmmaker Alain Robbe-Grillet, who wrote the screenplay for one of our favorite films Last Year at Marienbad. Funeral services will be held last month and will be preceded by a memorial viewing sometime next year. Or they'll all occur at the same time in a linear fashion... To be honest, I've always been a little confused by the whole thing.
Dan.
Tuesday, February 19, 2008
Thursday, February 14, 2008
LA Times - Probably the Final Chapter...of Shame!!
Ok, so we heard back from XXX XXXX at the LA Times about the blatant re-use of our Surrealism for their Entertainment fodder. As you can probably infer from the tone of our opening sentence, here, things did not go as we'd planned. This is XXX XXXX's new statement after his "investigation" (notice the use of sarcastic quotation marks):
"Dear Dan & Vince,
Just to follow up: I've discussed this with Patrick Day and his editors and they are unfamiliar with your blog. They came up with this premise together, while brainstorming. So maybe great minds are thinking alike?
For what it's worth: What I'm also getting on this is that such a juxtaposition between movies and reality is not a totally brand-new one, though, and variations on it have been done in years past.
Thank you again for writing with this matter of concern to you.
XXX XXXX"
So they're taking the easy way out by claiming total ignorance of our blog, and probably even our existence. But notice their use of flattery. If they're so "ignorant" of us, how can they possibly comprehend the greatness of our minds?!?! People pleaded ignorance about this mortgage crisis thing, too, but that didn't mean it wasn't real.
That's right. We said it. We're real.
I know we put on this big show that we're actually Sur-real, but we're just as tangible as the day we were born. Maybe even more so, since we're now far more massive, and it's just possible that mass equates to degree of reality.
And, LA Times, you really hurt our feelings. Sniff. All we wanted was a little picture of Rene Magritte somewhere in the Entertainment section. But no.
Ok. Now we're really mad. We thought we'd try to barrage Patrick Day with all kinds of slanderous rumors, but it turns out he was too clever for us by having a name that's almost exactly the same as a holiday where everybody drinks too much. So whatever we said about him would get lost in the annals of Google and if anybody did find it, they'd assume it was some type of liquor hallucination and forget all about it.
So now, it appears, the only thing left to do is to take this to the people who have been affected most by this scandal -- the candidates. Barack Obama and Hillary Clinton.
"Dear Dan & Vince,
Just to follow up: I've discussed this with Patrick Day and his editors and they are unfamiliar with your blog. They came up with this premise together, while brainstorming. So maybe great minds are thinking alike?
For what it's worth: What I'm also getting on this is that such a juxtaposition between movies and reality is not a totally brand-new one, though, and variations on it have been done in years past.
Thank you again for writing with this matter of concern to you.
XXX XXXX"
So they're taking the easy way out by claiming total ignorance of our blog, and probably even our existence. But notice their use of flattery. If they're so "ignorant" of us, how can they possibly comprehend the greatness of our minds?!?! People pleaded ignorance about this mortgage crisis thing, too, but that didn't mean it wasn't real.
That's right. We said it. We're real.
I know we put on this big show that we're actually Sur-real, but we're just as tangible as the day we were born. Maybe even more so, since we're now far more massive, and it's just possible that mass equates to degree of reality.
And, LA Times, you really hurt our feelings. Sniff. All we wanted was a little picture of Rene Magritte somewhere in the Entertainment section. But no.
Ok. Now we're really mad. We thought we'd try to barrage Patrick Day with all kinds of slanderous rumors, but it turns out he was too clever for us by having a name that's almost exactly the same as a holiday where everybody drinks too much. So whatever we said about him would get lost in the annals of Google and if anybody did find it, they'd assume it was some type of liquor hallucination and forget all about it.
So now, it appears, the only thing left to do is to take this to the people who have been affected most by this scandal -- the candidates. Barack Obama and Hillary Clinton.
Friday, February 08, 2008
LA Times - The Next Chapter...of Shame!!
Tsk Tsk Tsk.
As previously reported in "Surrealism...On the March!" notice would be paid to the LA Times about the purloining of our Surrealism. Here is the official Dan and Vince email release to every editor we could find contact information about at the LA Times:
"We were wondering what to do if it appears you guys re-appropriated a feature story from us without credit? It occurred to us that Patrick Day's Feb. 7th article "Real Lessons from Fake Presidents" bore an astoundingly striking resemblance to our blog "Let Hollywood Be Your Super Tuesday Guide," which was published on Feb. 1 and prominently linked to by the Internet Movie Database on Feb. 5th, generating thousands of hits and certainly leaving the door open for someone at the Times to read it. And then the Times article wound up in the exact same IMDb link list where our blog first appeared. We guess it's possible someone just happened to come up with the exact same idea five days later, using the same examples and some of the same Geena Davis jokes, but it begins to strain credulity, which, for us, takes some doing. Just because we're Surrealists, don't think we don't bleed like everybody else."
To which their reader's liason responded:
"Hi Dan & Vince, Thank you for writing. I'd be interested to know the particular elements that you are seeing as bearing an 'astoundingly striking resemblance' between those features so that I can look into this further. XXX XXXX Asst. Readers' Representative"
Notice the use of sarcastic quotation marks. We did.
Stay tuned.
As previously reported in "Surrealism...On the March!" notice would be paid to the LA Times about the purloining of our Surrealism. Here is the official Dan and Vince email release to every editor we could find contact information about at the LA Times:
"We were wondering what to do if it appears you guys re-appropriated a feature story from us without credit? It occurred to us that Patrick Day's Feb. 7th article "Real Lessons from Fake Presidents" bore an astoundingly striking resemblance to our blog "Let Hollywood Be Your Super Tuesday Guide," which was published on Feb. 1 and prominently linked to by the Internet Movie Database on Feb. 5th, generating thousands of hits and certainly leaving the door open for someone at the Times to read it. And then the Times article wound up in the exact same IMDb link list where our blog first appeared. We guess it's possible someone just happened to come up with the exact same idea five days later, using the same examples and some of the same Geena Davis jokes, but it begins to strain credulity, which, for us, takes some doing. Just because we're Surrealists, don't think we don't bleed like everybody else."
To which their reader's liason responded:
"Hi Dan & Vince, Thank you for writing. I'd be interested to know the particular elements that you are seeing as bearing an 'astoundingly striking resemblance' between those features so that I can look into this further. XXX XXXX Asst. Readers' Representative"
Notice the use of sarcastic quotation marks. We did.
Stay tuned.
Thursday, February 07, 2008
Surrealism Hijacked! Shame on the LA Times
I wake up this morning, squeeze a little coffee onto a toothbrush, brew up some Colgate, and put it in a mug for Dan, and then I e-zip on over to the LA Times online. And what do I find there? BLATANT THIEVERY!! MISAPPROPRIATON OF SURREALISM!! And the FAILURE TO GIVE PROPER CREDIT WHERE DUE!!!
What am I so mad about? I'll tell you (although, admittedly, it would be far more Surreal to not tell you...):
As many of you saw, the other day the Internet Movie Database prominently featured a link to our previous blog posting Let Hollywood Be Your Super Tuesday Guide (thank you, btw), in which Dan and I used movies and TV shows to predict the future efficacy of either our nation’s first Black or female president. Thousands of people read our blog – we have the stats from Google Analytics to prove it.
And then this morning, a full six days after our original post, the Los Angeles Times has the effrontery to blatantly rip us off without even sticking a picture of Rene Magritte in the article to throw us a bone. They ran a piece called Real Lessons from Fake Presidents, in which they used the exact same premise as our blog, except across racial, gender, and genre lines. They even used the same movies and TV shows we did (including 24, Deep Impact, and Commander in Chief), and made the same Geena Davis joke. As if that weren’t bad enough, they promised zombies in the tease, and then DID NOT DELIVER ZOMBIES.
You don’t have to take our word for it, though. You can read the article here.
First The Onion, and now this. Rest assured, notice will be paid.
Vince out (grrr).
What am I so mad about? I'll tell you (although, admittedly, it would be far more Surreal to not tell you...):
As many of you saw, the other day the Internet Movie Database prominently featured a link to our previous blog posting Let Hollywood Be Your Super Tuesday Guide (thank you, btw), in which Dan and I used movies and TV shows to predict the future efficacy of either our nation’s first Black or female president. Thousands of people read our blog – we have the stats from Google Analytics to prove it.
And then this morning, a full six days after our original post, the Los Angeles Times has the effrontery to blatantly rip us off without even sticking a picture of Rene Magritte in the article to throw us a bone. They ran a piece called Real Lessons from Fake Presidents, in which they used the exact same premise as our blog, except across racial, gender, and genre lines. They even used the same movies and TV shows we did (including 24, Deep Impact, and Commander in Chief), and made the same Geena Davis joke. As if that weren’t bad enough, they promised zombies in the tease, and then DID NOT DELIVER ZOMBIES.
You don’t have to take our word for it, though. You can read the article here.
First The Onion, and now this. Rest assured, notice will be paid.
Vince out (grrr).
Friday, February 01, 2008
Let Hollywood Be your Super Tuesday Guide!
As all of America knows, this could be the most important election of many of our lifetimes, and if the Democratic candidate gets elected this November, that person is guaranteed to make history by being either the first female or first African American president. A lot of people don’t know what to expect, should one of them reach the White House, so we thought we’d put together a handy-dandy guide to the future, as predicted by Hollywood films and TV shows that feature either an African American or female president. We hope this helps the democratic process this February 5th.
First, Barack Obama:
After the first African American president is elected, we can expect him to crack wise a lot (Head of State) while helping to foil several terrorist plots in only a few days (24), making our world and country a safer place. However, a large meteor will fall from space to destroy us (Deep Impact, The 5th Element), ushering in The Apocalypse. In the post-Apocalyptic wasteland that follows, greedy corporations will kill all the crops by watering them with sport drinks until a defrosted Army private from the past becomes an advisor to the President and the world is saved (Idiocracy).
Now, Hillary Clinton:
Initially, labor unrest will create a long period of silence where we have no idea what’s happening or what’s going to happen next (current season of 24). After that, faced with being the first First Gentleman, the guy who played The Absent-Minded Professor – in this case Robin Williams – will take control of the former First Lady’s social and gardening clubs (Kisses for my President). However, within the year, everyone will stop watching and the entire country will be cancelled (Commander in Chief).
Personally, we’re for Barack Obama. We think that reality show from Idiocracy, OWW! MY BALLS!! is a lot better than American Gladiators, My Dad is Better Than Your Dad, Moment of Truth, and even the Stuart Little movies.
And come on, we all saw what happened the last time we elected a white guy...
Vince out.
First, Barack Obama:
After the first African American president is elected, we can expect him to crack wise a lot (Head of State) while helping to foil several terrorist plots in only a few days (24), making our world and country a safer place. However, a large meteor will fall from space to destroy us (Deep Impact, The 5th Element), ushering in The Apocalypse. In the post-Apocalyptic wasteland that follows, greedy corporations will kill all the crops by watering them with sport drinks until a defrosted Army private from the past becomes an advisor to the President and the world is saved (Idiocracy).
Now, Hillary Clinton:
Initially, labor unrest will create a long period of silence where we have no idea what’s happening or what’s going to happen next (current season of 24). After that, faced with being the first First Gentleman, the guy who played The Absent-Minded Professor – in this case Robin Williams – will take control of the former First Lady’s social and gardening clubs (Kisses for my President). However, within the year, everyone will stop watching and the entire country will be cancelled (Commander in Chief).
Personally, we’re for Barack Obama. We think that reality show from Idiocracy, OWW! MY BALLS!! is a lot better than American Gladiators, My Dad is Better Than Your Dad, Moment of Truth, and even the Stuart Little movies.
And come on, we all saw what happened the last time we elected a white guy...
Vince out.
OFF STRIKE!!!
Dan and I are popping the champagne corks today, because we are officially off strike. The Practicing Surrealists Union of America's sympathy strike officially ended at 12:01 am PST this morning after talks with the WGA yesterday evening.
Dan, acting in his official capacity as Chief Negotiator for the PSUA, called the WGA to open discussions about granting us a side deal similar to the one they granted the defunct RKO pictures. After Dan called and explained what he was seeking, the conversation went something like this:
WGA: I'm sorry, you're who?
Dan: The Practicing Surrealists Union of America.
WGA: We've never heard of you.
Dan: We've been staging a sympathy strike.
WGA: Thank you. We appreciate your support.
Dan: Right. But we're really tired of not taking showers, so we'd kind of like to stop and get cleaned up. Maybe do some more surrealling.
WGA: ...Go ahead.
Dan: Well, we were thinking we could make one of those side deals you guys are doing, so it would be all official.
WGA: Do you make feature films or TV shows that use or seek to use union talent?
Dan: Lord, no.
WGA: Then why would you need a side deal?
Dan: Remember how Howard Hughes bankrupted RKO Radio Pictures in the 1950s and they went out of business?
WGA: I guess.
Dan: We thought that since you announced a side deal with a studio that hasn't really made any movies since "Escapade in Japan" in 1957, you'd be able to swing something with us.
WGA: Is this a joke?
Dan: No, it's sureal.
WGA: Who are you?
Dan: Do I have to go through the whole thing again, or can I just give you the acronym?
WGA: I have things to do.
Dan: Like draw up our side deal? So we can go back to work?
WGA: Look, do whatever the f**k you want, just don't call here again.
(click)
Yay!! Back to work!! (and just in time for the weekend, too...)
Vince out.
Dan, acting in his official capacity as Chief Negotiator for the PSUA, called the WGA to open discussions about granting us a side deal similar to the one they granted the defunct RKO pictures. After Dan called and explained what he was seeking, the conversation went something like this:
WGA: I'm sorry, you're who?
Dan: The Practicing Surrealists Union of America.
WGA: We've never heard of you.
Dan: We've been staging a sympathy strike.
WGA: Thank you. We appreciate your support.
Dan: Right. But we're really tired of not taking showers, so we'd kind of like to stop and get cleaned up. Maybe do some more surrealling.
WGA: ...Go ahead.
Dan: Well, we were thinking we could make one of those side deals you guys are doing, so it would be all official.
WGA: Do you make feature films or TV shows that use or seek to use union talent?
Dan: Lord, no.
WGA: Then why would you need a side deal?
Dan: Remember how Howard Hughes bankrupted RKO Radio Pictures in the 1950s and they went out of business?
WGA: I guess.
Dan: We thought that since you announced a side deal with a studio that hasn't really made any movies since "Escapade in Japan" in 1957, you'd be able to swing something with us.
WGA: Is this a joke?
Dan: No, it's sureal.
WGA: Who are you?
Dan: Do I have to go through the whole thing again, or can I just give you the acronym?
WGA: I have things to do.
Dan: Like draw up our side deal? So we can go back to work?
WGA: Look, do whatever the f**k you want, just don't call here again.
(click)
Yay!! Back to work!! (and just in time for the weekend, too...)
Vince out.
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